08benji

So I decided for some time that I want to expand my art elsewhere and that was when Buzzly came along but sadly I don't feel like I belong there so I asked around and some kind soul recommended an art site called Artfol, I like it there already! I submitted 2 things and already have 2 followers.

So if you like, please follow me on Artfol - https://www.artfol.co/silverblaze55

Would anyone be so kind to help me out with something, Its is namely my social life…

To catch up with what is going on from 10+ years ago I worked in a Practice as a housekeeper with a small team and even though people have come and gone, My social life suffered for it. It was tough when after my home life with my family isn’t so great you would think that work would balance it out somewhere right? Well, That was what I thought at first. I made some great friends and they left and the environment at work started to change quite badly, The new staff came along at we eventually got on well and I found out months later that they didn’t really like me (plus they got the sack). This went on for some time and my sadness were affecting me to the point that I had to kept it bottled in for as long as 10 years, not even joking…

I couldn’t tell anyone my problems for trust issues was severely bad, It actually affected my health and had my first panic attack plus dark thoughts so I quitted my job. So I helped out at home for a year and by some miracle, there was a job offering back at my old job which I took. I don’t know how I got through it but I felt strong like nothing can hurt me like I learnt from the past and what to expect and now being back for 3 years whenever someone talks to me (if im lucky cause I’m busy) my mind kinda phases out and it takes me a while to say something so I always apologise saying “I’m miles away” whilst laughing but the sad truth is I’m SO used to people not talking to me and I actually want to have a social life again. But my brain just won’t register that people talk to me its like “Work, Go home…Done”.

I don’t really know what to do, I do try but I don’t want people who actually talk to me like I’m ignoring them. It really really sucks...

Do you…

Cuss: Usually when nobody is around so, Yes!

Sing in the shower: No, Its embarrassing! O||.||O

Go to School: No

Work: Yes, I’m a Housekeeper for a Practice (it really sucks)

Type with all of your fingers: No, only with my main fingers.

Drink and drive: No to both.

Snore: No.

Sleep walk: No

Sleep talk: No.

Like watching sunrises and sunsets: No, I’m a night owl!

Stargaze: Yes, I love it!!.

Create scenes in your head when listening to music: Yes, Who doesn’t

Do you believe in…

A God: No.

Reincarnation: No.

Afterlife: Yes, Well sort of.

Signs/Messages from the deceased: Yes, I do believe I have a Spirit Guide.

The Backrooms: ???

Limbo: No, Its sad to think of.

Glitch in the Matrix: No.

Magic: Yes.

Love at first sight: I used to but now, No.

Ghosts: Somewhat.

Aliens: No, I’m not into space stuff (Not even a fan of Sci Fi)

Other Dimensions: Don’t Know…

Yourself: I’m trying to.

Are you…

Introverted: Yes

Extroverted: No

Perverted: Who knows? ; )

Loud: No

Quiet: Yes

A People Person: Why, yes, I do try.

A Loner: Sometimes its best to be.

Paranoid: No.

Optimistic: I wanna believe!

Pessimistic: My sad little “worst case scenario” called life .

Crazy: I sometimes talk to myself but its more thinking aloud.

Spontaneous: I hate not having a plan.

Funny: Oh my god, do I try!

Sweet: I’ve been told.

Dirty: I sure hope not.

Responsible: Yup, sure. You can count on me.

Creative: I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t.

Jealous: Not really.

Nostalgic: I like to remember the good times.

Cute: I think I have a complex.

Photogenic: I love photography.

Dependable: Yes.

Greedy: I’m a saver than a spender.

Social: I wish.

A Good Listener: All I do is listen.

A Dreamer: Is there ever a time where I don’t?

A Fighter: Nope.

A Party Animal: Sadly No

A Gamer: I wish I was again.

A Computer Freak: Used to.

The Basics:

Name: Ben, Benji or Benjamin

Birth Date: August 18th, 1988

Birth Place: England-Land

Gender: Male

Eye Color: Dark Brown

Hair Color: Black, It was light brown when I was little.

Currently living: In a miserable match box of a house.

Languages you speak?: English

Scar(s) you have?: There’s a scar on my wrist from my dark past.

Orientation?: My sexuality???

Relationship Status?: Single

Tattoos?: No

Piercings?: No

Pets?: Four Jack Russels

Myers/Briggs type:

Favorites:

Food: Pizza, Curries.

Drink: Pepsi or Coke.

Bands / Singers: Any band from the 90s (Blur, Oasis etc)

Songs: Things Can Only Get Better, (there is LOADS)

Movies: Death Becomes Her, Brides Maid, Over Her Dead Body, Bridget Jones Diary

TV Shows: Family Guy, American Dad, Simpsons, Only Fools and Horses, Fawlty Towers.

Games: Resident Evil 2&3 (PS1) Bioshock, Broken Sword, Tales of (Xillia 1,2 & Zesteria)

Colors: Red, black, purple and silver

Random Things you really love: Anything supernatural related, BL related stuff. (I can’t think of anymore!) T_T

Preferences:

Pepsi or Coke?: Pepsi cause coke sometimes makes me feel ill for some reason.

Anime or Disney?: Anime (sorry Disney but you disappoint me)

Guys or Girls: Guys. Cause i’m gay (duh)

Lips or Eyes?: I’m thinking eyes?

Kisses or Hugs?: Hugs are nice!

Eating or Drinking?: Drinking. I’m always thirsty

Novels or Comics?: Comics

Summer or Winter?: Winter, I hate the horrible summer heat!

Outdoors or Indoors?: Indoors

Camera or Phone?: Camera

Playstation or XBox: Playstation, I grew up with it.

TV or Computer?: Computers. TV’s boring nowadays!

Personal:

Why did you choose your username (to be like that)?: I like the colour Silver cause its mysterious, like me. Blaze is related to fire cause I’m a Leo and 55 is a random number.

Who was your very first follower here?: Someone who randomly added me.

Have you ever had any Featured Artwork? My art sucks…

Show us the first Artwork you submitted: (I can't remember)

Show us your most recent submission:

Look to your left, what s the first thing you see?: My tacky bedroom wallpaper

Now your right: Fabric Wardrobe full of clothes

Something you can't live without: Wifi.

The Last...

Person you saw: My mum

Person you hugged: A friend from work on New Years Eve.

Movie you watched: Howls Moving Castle

Song You Listened To: Time Warp

Thing you ate / drank: Juice

Time you cried and why: A lot of things upset me and I block it out so I can’t remember.

Time you laughed and why: A Gameplay of Krinx Tv (Minx & Krism’s Laugh is hilarious)

Time you went out: To work. Hate my job.

Totally Random~

Where is your dream holiday location?: Umm… probably Japan or maybe France (if it weren’t for stupid covid)

What are you wearing right now?: Grey thin jumper, blue Joggers and black trainers.

What is the last thing you bought?: Slippers for my dad’s birthday next Tuesday.

When did you join DA?: 10+ years ago.

Why did you join?: To make friends and share art.

Are you a member of any other websites?: Yep. Buzzly and Discord.

Three Extra Questions

Which one of your OCs is your Favorite?: Alex Heywood

Which one of your FCs is your Favorite?: FCs???

Your favorite fictional Characters?: I don’t know, maybe…Newt or Jacob and Queenie from Fantastic Beasts.

Ever since I returned from Buzzly I have more "watchers" here, I obviously still think it could be fake accounts that are still going. So if you're an active and genuine watcher than please comment so I don't block you. I just want to actually sort out my profile page and start to use here again.

If anyone is reading this, PLEASE don't just click Watch and just never come back. I'm finding it really annoying and rude to know who is an active person anymore, Thank you for the Watch but please actually interact with the artist. Who knows we could actually be friends you just haven't met yet. :)